It's no secret that unemployment can be depressing. For many, the initial news can be followed by days of laying on the couch eating Cheetos and watching TV. Perhaps you just can't believe that you no longer have somewhere to go in the morning. And the idea of putting in the energy to get another job sounds overwhelming. characterized by numbness, disbelief and even lethargy. While for most people this period is a pretty natural response to loss, you can take one of the many online depression tests or seek help from a qualified mental health counselor if you feel like it is seriously disrupting your life. For those who are experiencing mild depression, this article offers some tips on how to move forward.
Bruce Levine, Ph.D. argues, in his book Surviving America's Depression Epidemic that, as a nation, we are drowning in depression. We have become so disconnected from each other and from the world around us that it is hard to keep our heads above water even when we are working. The high rates of anti-depressant medications that people take (maybe as high as one in eight people) are a good sign of this. Working helps distract many of us from the emptiness we are feeling so losing our work can be a real wake up call. For others, their identity is built around their work so being unemployed is like not being a person.
The beginning of coming out of depression, as far as Levine is concerned, is to understand that depression is rooted in an energy crisis. We simply don't have the energy to move forward. This means that before we change our thinking or engage in work finding strategies we have to find ways to get filled up. Asking people to do otherwise is like asking them to drive an empty car a few more miles to the next gas station. If the car is out of gas its stopped. We must first address this before we do anything else. So here are five strategies that can help fill you back up.
1. Stop beating yourself up. It's simply exhausting to beat yourself up because you are feeling depressed. And it only makes matters worse. You can begin to plug your energy leak by simply acknowledge that you are feeling depressed and accepting that your feelings are valid. Feelings pass much more quickly when we accept rather than resist them.
2. Find something to laugh about. There is little else that lifts depression like humor. I am convinced that this is because depression is largely self-focused while humor moves us outside ourselves. Even when we laugh at ourselves we do so as an observer. Give yourself an opportunity to engage the larger world. Laugh at funny movies, listen to jokes, practice laughing at every opportunity. If you are feeling at a loss for what will make you laugh have a funny movie night where you watch nothing but comedies. Humor lightens our spirits, relaxes are bodies, and connects us to other people.
3. Connect to people who love and energize you. Ever see the Saturday Night Live character Debbie Downer? She can turn any event sour with her dour view of the world. We all know people like this. Maybe you even are one. What matters most is that when your energy is low you spend time with people who can fill you up. You can't afford to give away your precious reserves to other people while you are recharging. Make a list of people that fill you up and make plans to spend time with them.
4. Imagine the possibilities. When you are depressed, it can often be hard to see your way beyond the end of the day much less into having your next job. Giving yourself the space to imagine what yourself working can go a long way in motivating you to keep on looking. Having the sense of possibility seems to also open up your field of visions so that you see opportunities that you might otherwise miss. The easiest way to do this is to set five to ten minutes aside. Begin by doing about one minute of deep, diaphragmatic breathing and allow your body to relax. Then imagine what your new job will be like. Imagine it down to the smallest detail. You will be happy, laughing, enjoying your co-workers. See yourself doing the work you love. Imagine the sense of accomplishment you have at doing it well. When you are done visualizing, ask yourself what is one action you can do right now to move you towards that goal. Intuitively calling an old friend may come up or checking out a company you heard of. Follow those insights and see what happens.
5. Move your body. For most people exercise is a potent remedy to depression. It moves us out of our minds and into our bodies. It increases our blood flow to the brain (which helps us think of new ideas), decreases our stress level and can even help us sleep better. It doesn't really matter what you do from taking a fifteen minute walk to playing tennis with a friend or running around the park with your dog. Just move your body, at least three times a week for twenty to thirty minutes, and you will feel an increase in energy and a better sense of balance.
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Scott Mills, Ph.D. is a San Francisco based integrative life coach blending an East/West perspective as he helps his clients live less stressful, more vibrant lives. You can get more information and tools at [http://mindbodyexperience.com] and check out the Mind Body Experience Blog at http://www.mindbodyexperience.com/blog/